Hi. I’m back. Did you miss me? Probably not… which is totally cool because I didn’t miss you either. As a matter of fact, while I was in Europe, I completely forgot I have this retarded Blog. Europe was cool though, however, I learned how much Paris sucks. I think that every time you hear someone stating how much France sucks they actually just mean Paris sucks. The general population that travels to France for vacation most likely goes to Paris because it’s such a famous city. It is said that Paris is the city of love, inspiration, awe, fantasy, artistic motivation, etc… but in reality it’s a busy, messy, over crowded, dirty, confusing and loud city. Being an artist and designer myself I always dreamed of seeing Paris in hope that it will inspire me or some shit like that. Instead… it inspired me to sit in my hotel room and watch “How to Train Your Dragon” on this wicked big screen TV they hooked me up with.

The worst experience must of been the Eiffel tower. I have never been to a place where there are sooooooooooo many stupid annoying tourists and stupid annoying people trying to sell you stupid annoying trinkets such as cheap-ass little Eiffel tower statues that probably break if you look at it the wrong way. It tweaked me out that there was someone trying to sell you this junk every 5 meters, on every corner…. everywhere! It was like a Mafia of annoying motherfuckers trying to force you to buy their garbage. This one guy walked up to me and tried to sell me a couple pieces of string telling me it’s some Jamaican magic, good-luck ring-thing when you wrap it around your pinky or some shit. WTF retard… 1st of all I’m in Paris… the last thing I want is anything to do with Jamaica… secondly… your trying to sell me string… go fucking hang yourself with your Jamaican ass-flossing device… douche bag… stop ruining my vacation and go earn some honest money at a job that actually benefits society. I also saw this one guy trying to sell a statue of the Eiffel tower to an older lady and her husband. The lady said no, (obviously), and kept walking while buddy was chasing her for about 30 meters trying to force her to buy the piece of shit. What struck me the most though had to be the lack of balls the husband showed. He just kept walking with his wife, hand in hand, pretending like nothing is going on while his wife is about to get the little Eiffel statue forced up her ass. Sad. It’s really not that hard to tell someone to Fuck Off!!

Paris is so cluttered and out of control it sets the standard for “Mayhem.” When you go to France you go to Provence… wine country baby… it’s calm, peaceful, warm, amazing food, fresh air, hot chicks, open scenery and this amazing energy that just floats around the place. That’s the real France.