I was looking at my Blog Stats yesterday to see how the traffic to this piece of shit site is doing. In the section that shows the different keywords people have used to find this Blog I found the best keywords I have ever seen. Someone typed in “fucked up dead pictures” into some search engine and found my Blog instead. That’s fucking wicked!! I guess there is some fucked up dead pictures somewhere on here… I hope this messed up creeper found what he was looking for. All I know is this made me laugh fucking hard… who the hell searches for shit like that any way??

If you look at some of the other search terms people have used it should make you laugh… there are some other good ones like “stupid shark“, “ugly shark“, “fucking babe“… etc.

Keep up the good work!

Seriously… the amount of rain that Vancouver gets every year could easily supply the rest of the world with fresh drinking water. No one here wants all this water. We are sick of water… if I have to look at water again I might puke. Never knew it could be possible to be sick of water… which is fucked because water is pretty much the most important thing in life. There is this girl who I went to school with and she actually hates water. She won’t drink water unless it is mixed with juice, syrup, kool-aid, stuff, pee & other things. She said that water tastes disgusting… it’s like saying, “no I can’t breathe normal air… it’s so fucking gross… man I fucking hate air… I’ll only breath if it’s like mixed with fabreeze, fart or exhaust from an old broken down Ford diesel.” What a dumb bitch.

But yea… Vancouver is stealing the world’s water. Vancouver is the reason there are skinny little children in Africa that are on the verge of dying 24/7 due to a lack of water… fucking Vancouver. We don’t do anything productive with this water either… just sell it for tons of money to stupid Americans in the form of drinking water or hydro power.

I hate Mondays…

Well well… it’s May 21st!! According to that fucking retard, Harold Camping, the Rapture is supposed to go down at around 6pm tonight, (Pacific Time). I wonder what Harold Camping is planning on doing on Sunday morning when it turns out that nothing unusual happened at all and the world just continues to be the same, monotonous piece of shit that it has been for the last several years. What about all those morons who spent their live savings, quit their jobs, dedicated their “last” couple days to the cause of this media stunt??? How pissed will they be! But seriously… you have to be pretty dumb to believe some radio host, who was already wrong in 1994, that the world is going to end and full on spend your life savings, or retirement money, on the spot. It’s almost as if these people want the world to end… I mean yea life kinda sucks sometimes but being massacred in some freak-earthquake is definitely not a better alternative… unless you’re a fucking psycho… which, in that case, you deserve to have 50 stories worth of falling glass from a skyscraper disintegrate your body.

On Sunday morning I would not be surprised if there was mass suicides. Some of these Judgement Day supporters clearly reallllly want to go to heaven… which basically means they want to, and are ready/stoked to die. When they realise that it was all a hoax and they are unfortunately still alive on earth they will probably kill themselves any way.

Being a Catholic myself I hate this kind of shit. I hate when people take religion and use it against their own kind. If you want to go to heaven so bad right now then just go fucking kill yourself and see where you end up.

See you all on Sunday morning.

It has been about a month and a half since I graduated with a Bachelor’s Degree in _______ Design. I did well in school, made good connections, built a strong portfolio, gained fantastic experience and felt like I was ready to go out and grab that dream job. LOL!!!! I have never felt like a bigger loser in my life. Here I am… with this “education”, “skill set”, “bullshit”… yet no one really wants to talk to me. And I’m not even alone on this… most of my graduating class is in the same shit hole, same with other graduates from other programs that have nothing to do with any type of design. It’s the same at every job… even gay-ass-shitty-jobs that I wouldn’t even want… they want a min of 5 years of experience in the industry. WTF!! Fuck you industry!! If I could I would gladly deliver a min of 5 blows to your fucking head with a baseball bat. How is anyone supposed to get this “5 years of exp” if no one is willing to hire fresh graduates??? If they do hire us the pay is so bad that we can barely survive off it. I think the design industry is a piece of shit… why did I get myself into it… I should have gone to business school or engineering or someshit. Design companies are cutty as fuck… the bosses or art directors want you to do as much as possible but pay you as little as possible… forget benefits of any kind. They make it seem like they are doing you a favour for allowing you to work for their company. It’s such bullshit.

Any way I need to get back to writing more cover letters and searching endlessly for any bitch ass job I can get. Fuck.

If Judgement Day actually comes on Saturday I hope enough shit gets fucked up that getting a job will be the last of anyones worries.

When I first created this Blog, about a year ago, I did it mainly out of boredom and just wanting a place to rant about random shit that makes no sense and be able to come back two months later and re-read all the bullshit I posted and laugh, or cry, or finally realize that I’m a huge asshole that needs to cheer up and do something more productive with my life… whatever. Any way… at first I didn’t expect to have any views what so ever because I, A) didn’t give a shit, B) because I didn’t feel like actually taking the effort to promote this Blog & C) because this Blog doesn’t really revolve around one topic that would interest enough people to actually search for or continue visiting this Blog.

To my surprise I have been gaining the amount of views per day and now I see that many people are actually reading this gayness.

I just want to take this opportunity to say thank you for reading and/or re-visiting my Blog. There are probably 100,000,000,000,000,000,987,348,690 better ways to spend your time like lighting your penis on fire while beer-bonging Drain-O.

I guess I will continue to write whatever the fuck comes to my mind 🙂

I woke up today all stoked on life because it’s sunny outside and I had an awesome night. Went into the kitchen to have breakfast but instead I decided to read todays paper which had a fairly interesting article about doomsday… which is totally cool because doomsday is way more awesome then yogurt and cereal.

So…. apparently Judgement Day is, in fact, supposed to happen on May 21, 2011… which is in 4 days… word!? It’s not going to be the actual physical “end of the world”, (as in the planet earth gets blown to shreds due to earthquakes, volcanoes, meteors, nukes, aliens, black holes, things and other cool stuff), but rather a “cleansing”. Jesus is supposed to come and send all the sinners to hell while the few who spent they’re lives praying will stay, or go to Heaven, or whatever. Even though this story has a high probability of being complete bullshit there is always that annoying possibility that there might be truth to it. This got me thinking… am I a sinner?? Realising how dumb that question was I quickly revised it a bit. How bad of a sinner am I?? Hmmmmm… not that bad I think. Obviously this piece-of-shit blog is a huge sin but I don’t think I’m that bad as a person. Sure I watch porn, swear, make fun of people, never go to Church, have pre-marital sex, drink, stay up past my bedtime, have a thing for guns and knives, drive over the speed limit, listen to rap-music and try to shoot Chipmunks with my BB gun when they come onto my deck and start eating my strawberries. (I fucking love strawberries… don’t ever fuck with them!!) But apart from that I don’t think I’m that bad of a guy. There are way worse people out there who definitely need to go to hell… like my ex-girlfriend for example! If Jesus is all up in the 21st century like most of us are then he is probably reading this blog because this blog is the fucking shit! Jesus… before you come visit us on the 21st can you please consider this proposition. I strongly suggest that you send all the mean ex-girlfriends to hell… the ones that cheated on us, didn’t appreciate us, thought they were the fucking boss and played us like it’s cool. You can also send murderers and rapists to hell as well… and anyone who wears EdHardy or watches Jersey Shore… except my girlfriends sister… she watches it but she’s really dope and I’m trying to convince her not to watch that piece of shit show. Yea… that’s all I ask of you Jesus! Seriously… the world will be a better place without those kinds of people. Oh wait… while you’re at it… throw all the Wall Street exec’s into a special pit of death as well because they stole all our fucking money. No wait! I have a better idea… give us, the working class, an endless supply of pimped AR-15’s and ammo so we can go show those thieving sons-of-bitches what the deal is!!

Any way… like I said… that Judgement-Day-hype is a bunch of bull that makes more idiots like me read the newspaper… which gets someone paid.

Here is the article.

http://www.vancouversun.com/Sinners+have+four+days+until+Judgment+prepared/4795107/story.html

….so sick right!?!?!?!